Due in no small part to the quality of its chocolate-less brethren the digestive, upon which it is based, the McVities Chocolate Digestive simply outclass all other contenders. The quantity of chocolate used shows thoughtful restraint, resulting in a harmonious balance of biscuit and chocolate. This is good to see in these times when an almost vulgar over use of chocolate is the resort of less talented biscuit manufactures. Perhaps because they work so well when dunked in a brew, these are Snr’s favourites.

The Rich Tea presents us straight away with a paradox. If these are 'Rich' tea, where are 'Poor' tea biscuits and what on earth do they taste like? Well they would have to be fairly ropy old affairs because the Rich tea itself is not exactly a self contained one biscuit flavour festival.

So what are they good for? Dunking of course. The Rich tea can drive even the staunchest anti-dunker to dunk. The Rich Tea then comes into its own, convincing you that you have done the right thing by giving the eater the reward of sloppy hot Rich tea, which is actually better than what you started with. They’re a salt of the earth biscuit, and that’s why the Genuine Nice Guy Brindo swears by them (although he’s too nice to swear, of course).

The Custard Cream is a classic, from time immemorial. It’s a little known fact that the incisor teeth of the male human are specially adapted to prize apart the two biscuits of the custard cream so that the tasty cream layer can be got at. I love these fellas, and I know that they’re Paul Wides’ favourites.

I've often thought that the Fig Roll is as close to spaceman food as the biscuit world has ever got, cause I'm sure you could live on these for months and that their high density and non-crumbly nature would lend themselves to use in the space program. The classic fig roll for me will always the type that came in a little cardboard box with top open and covered in cellophane revealing the fig rolls all end on in one long stack. The biscuits themselves appeared to be sliced from one huge fig roll. With the hard as nails shell but soft underbelly, it’s little wonder that Lloydy packs three in his lunch box every day.

Ahh the simple Shortcake biscuit, always there to bulk out the biscuit tin.  A steady performer the shortcake is often overlooked but always a welcome sight on the biscuit plate. It really comes into its own in those little packs of biscuits you get in hotel rooms, with the biscuit eater will greeting it like a long lost friend. Its edge pattern makes it appear like a little 'road up' sign, again reinforcing its identity as a workhorse of the biscuit world.  I think, if all the rectangular biscuits, this, for me, just about takes the biscuit!

The basic design of the Tunnock’s Caramel Wafer consists of four layers of caramel sandwiched between 5 wafers then wrapped in a thin shell of actual milk chocolate. Each biscuit is wrapped in its own rectangle of foil and paper with its distinctive red and gold stripes and proudly boasting the message that 'More than 4,000,000 of these biscuits are made and sold each week'.  If the Judge had his way, it would be 5 million – he’d sell his soul for a pack of these beauties.

I fear I am going to upset some of you, but I have an opinion of the Bourbon biscuit, some what similar to that of Jennifer Lopez. Both are when described sound lovely and are greatly admired. However I find my self somewhat underwhelmed. I often feel that I'm missing the point with the Bourbon biscuit and by rights should like it a lot more than I do. However, I find that I will frequently pass it over , frequenting as it does biscuit assortments, in favour of biscuits with apparently lesser charms.  However, my dislike of the Bourbon is why I tend to room with  BCR on tours, cos he eats my complimentary bourbon while I tuck in to his shortcake.

The Malted Milk. The Cow biscuit. Fantastic. Best biscuit graphics ever. Look at it, its a got a big standing up cow and a little sitting down one. The skilled cow biscuit eater will be able to nibble off the outer bits of the biscuit to leave just the cows, which surely are the most delicious bits. If I was some kind of sultan bloke I would no doubt have a harem of girlys nibbling the cows out of malted milk biscuits for me. With his predilection for Cow Eyes, Firms loves these.

A complete one off, the Garibaldi biscuit is unlike any other, and as such commands a unique position in the biscuit world.  Where do I begin, its got more currants than a fruit shortcake, they come in big slabs with little marks where you are supposed to break them up. It’s almost like they are shipping in kit form, and it requires a little extra bit of engagement from the biscuit eater.  Being a historian and a bookworm, Mitch loves the fact that this biscuit gets a mention in ‘Garibaldi’s Defence of The Roman Empire’ by GM Trevelyan

The undisputed king of the large diameter biscuits, the Digestive is truly an iconic biscuit. Found in two main varieties, SweetMeal and WholeMeal, the digestive biscuit sets a standard for the whole biscuit world. Its satisfying nature make the biscuit eater consider how many to have at a time 1,2 or maybe 3. It's versatile providing the base for many more elaborate biscuits, (see Chocolate Caramels), and even chocolate covered biscuit bars such as the Breakaway, or the base for Cheesecakes. It’s a genuine all-rounder, and this is why it will always be Jimmy Hat’s favourite.

Jammie Dodgers, are simple in concept a sandwich of 'jam' and two shortcake biscuits with a heart shaped whole in the upper biscuit to reveal the jam. The Jam is billed as raspberry flavour but is in fact made from plums and assorted chemicals, presumably because actual raspberry jam wasn't up to the biscuit engineering task of adhering the two biscuits together. This also makes attempts to part both biscuits somewhat futile, due to the adhesive jam.  In essence, the Jammy Dodger gives you two biscuits for the price of one, so it’s no surprise that it’s top of Frase’s order.